Although I have only been with my boyfriend for about a year, I have such a healthy relationship that I wanted to share some advice on how to find and maintain your own:
Take Your Time
I have always been someone that loves commitment. So much so, that I made every guy I met out to be the perfect potential boyfriend, which was a big mistake. It is important to take your time to begin a relationship when you know it has real potential.
Also, when you do begin a relationship make sure you allow it to develop. Don’t end things the second you hit a rough patch.
Although, if early on your S.O. shows signs of cheating, abuse, or if you lose any trust, end it immediately. No matter how much you like them or feel you can fix them understand that you can’t. You will only end up getting hurt and regretting the amount of time you wasted trying to fix them.
Don’t Give up your Social Life
I have had an issue with this in my past relationships. I forget about my friends and focus solely on spending time with my boyfriend at the time. I even started doing this with my current S.O., until he showed me the importance of us having our own lives outside of the relationship. If you consume yourself with your relationship you will end up losing your friends and regretting it.
Trust is Important
I didn’t realize how important trust was until I actually had it. My first relationship was awful and consisted of zero trust, which made it hard for me to trust anyone. Now that I am with someone I have a solid foundation of trust with, I am able to feel relaxed and comfortable, and not have to worry about every time I am away from him.
If any of you know that scared and sick feeling you get in your stomach when you hear about your S.O. going out without you, please take a moment to think about if your relationship is worth it. Imagine never having to feel that feeling ever again; I wish I had sooner and am so unbelievably grateful to not have experienced it at all this past year.
Spend Time Apart
This is another super valuable thing I learned from my current boyfriend. We would sometimes go weeks on end never apart, and it made us both miserable. It’s like when you have been hanging out with one of your good friends way too much, everything they do will begin to annoy you and drive you crazy. Even though spending time with your S.O. is the best thing ever, trust me that you will be even happier and enjoy that person a lot more if you aren’t with them 24/7.
I have found this to be very true this summer, since we have been long distance for the past couple of months. I was super sad to say goodbye to him and couldn’t imagine not seeing him all the time, but now when we do get to see each other it is so much more special and we cherish those memories way above the rest.
Trust your Gut
If you deep down feel you aren’t being treated well, you are more than likely correct. Take that feeling and think about if the relationship you are in is worth it or if you’d be better off without them.
Listen to your Friends and Family
This is SO IMPORTANT. If the majority of your friends or family disapprove of your S.O. it is time to take a step back and really think about your relationship. We all put blinders up when we are in a relationship so if people are pointing out major flaws in your relationship they are probably seeing something you aren’t.
If you are in a healthy relationship, you’ll know it, and you will feel so happy you weeded out all the bad ones and got yourself a good one.
Thanks for reading, let me know what you think!